Key Coaching Models: The 70+ Models Every Manager and Coach Needs to Know by Stephen Gribben

Author:Stephen Gribben [Gribben, Stephen]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
ISBN: 9781292151922
Publisher: Pearson Education Limited
Published: 2016-10-18T04:00:00+00:00

When to use it

To establish a clear understanding of the value, expectation and importance of the contribution between individuals, teams and organisations.

To avoid ‘one-way’ relationships which build resentment and destroy trust and value.

To ensure that relationships are maintained, balanced and fair.

To create, maintain and develop relationships built upon trust, value, mutual respect and worth.

How to use it

Choosing and communicating what is going to be offered is the first part of setting emotional contracts so as to make clear the extent of the commitment: the things that are willing to be done or what is being offered; what the expected contribution is. This is important as it lays out to all parties the specifics of the commitment so that it can be accurately understood, expected and valued.

Knowing then what will complement and work well with this offering is the second part of the process: to make clear what is expected in return. This is vital as it communicates the value that the other party can offer: that they play an important and valuable part in the contract, and that they also have a clearly defined role with expectations. This protects people from assuming or guessing what they could or should do to ‘pay back fairly’. It also makes clear that there is something to give in return that is of value and would be appreciated.

The secret of success, though, is vital here: the appreciation of value must be clearly stated and communicated so that others know specifically what would be valued from them, or the extent to which it is of value. This helps both parties achieve a sense of fairness and parity based upon recipient appreciation rather than level of difficulty or inconvenience to the provider. Appreciation is best measured in terms of value and impact rather than just quantity or complexity.

It is important always to ask for something since asking for nothing communicates that there is nothing of value that the other person could offer. Avoid at all costs the perception that there is little or no value in what is being offered or could be offered in return, as this destroys self-worth and ultimately the relationship.

Figure 13.2 The setting emotional contracts model

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